I got a nice email today from the fellow at O’Reilly who’s in charge of condensing my article for the print edition. He needs an author bio line to go under the article. Hmm. I’m stumped. Which way to go?
There’s the painfully banal:
John Riney is a technologist and experimenter living in Charleston, SC.
To the desperate:
John Riney is a guy living in Charleston, SC that would like your phone number, if you are modestly hot and don’t hate nerds.
To the incomprehensible:
John Riney owes me 20 bucks.
Dear Interweb, do you have any suggestions?
John C. Riney. Thinker. Tinkerer. King. Vampire slayer. Part-time steam locomotive. Purveyor of monkey business. Man of mystery. Colonic gerbil. Charleston resident. Inventor of the T-shirt. The gorilla in your mist. Writer of this article.
Google has turned against me and decided that looking up author bio should return some PERL modules.
Rajarshi Guha is a grad student working on computer-aided chemistry. When not studying and porting ancient (and twisted) F77 code, he fiddles around with Python programming and the Beowulf in his lab, and daydreams about marrying his fiancee.
That’s the nice little freshmeat bio it returned. Just replace Rajarshi Guha with John Riney, grad student with technologist and experimenter, studying and porting ancient F77 code with w00tbox production, and Beowulf with Redneck 1. The last line is perfect for a Morgan shout-out. Who knows, she probably reads O’Reilly books. So, in the spirit of believing Google will never fail at any problem, this is your obvious answer.
Ok, so Google lacks the creative flair of certain humans and Vampire slayers.
Genius with a capital G.
–riney
Google does know everything.
(in Frylock’s voice from “Carl”) Hey M, lemme get them digits, you know?
–riney